Dear Toughtalkdc,
I have two friends, they are married.  I know for a FACT that the female in the couple has cheated on the male.  They have a baby that looks NOTHING like the father.  The baby “resembles” the mother slightly, but not the father at all!  I know that this can happen, but I also know that she has cheated MULTIPLE TIMES.  Should I tell my friend?  I’m friends with them both, so I’m torn.  My friend was so happy to be having his first child, I think he’s blinded to the fact that this child looks NOTHING like him.  I’ve also had a few friends that have taken care of children until they were almost adults, only to find out they weren’t theirs.  I would hate to see him go through that.  I’ve been friends with them both for well over 10 years.  I’ve never mentioned the cheating, so I guess I’ve been a bad friend either way.  But now that this child is born, I’m feeling particularly guilty about not saying anything.  What should I do?


Good Morning Anonymous,

My suggestion to you is…DON’T SAY A WORD!!  You can’t destroy both of your friends’  lives on your assumptions.  You said that your friend has cheated multiple times…and that may be true…but that doesn’t mean your other friend isn’t the father of his child.  I think you’re way too invested in your friends’ relationship!  I know you care for your friends and their well- being, but let me ask you a question…Why do you want to tell him?  Is it that you don’t want to see him continue to stay in a relationship that isn’t fair to him?  Or is it that you don’t want to see him hurt in any way?  If your answer is closer to the latter…then by revealing such damaging information to him it will only bring him the same hurt that you’re trying to shield him from.  Or do you care for him because you see a good man and wonder why is he with her…a woman who takes advantage of him and treats him the way that she does…and not with a woman like you…who would treat him the way he is supposed to be treated!!  If that last comment is off base and doesn’t have any merit, then I apologize.  But if it does have a little credence to it then my advice to you is walk away…leave it alone.  Allow nature to take its course.  And just know whatever is done in the dark will eventually come into the light.  If she is behaving the way you say she is, it’s just a matter of time before all of her secrets are revealed!!  Have a Wonderful Weekend!!