It’s Monday! Skins & Cowboys Fans…You Are What I Thought You Were!

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Good Morning Toughtalkers…It’s Monday and the more things change the more they remain the same.  The Washington Redskins and the Dallas Cowboys Fans…your teams are what I thought they were…LOUSY!  I recently posted a blog about your teams and the way you guys are in denial about the depths of your Awfulness….Yes it’s that bad!!!  

The Redskins went to visit our brothers from the north on Sunday when they faced the Buffalo Bills in Toronto, Canada.  The team MUST have left their playbooks and/or players at customs because it was the most unwatchable game of the Washington Redskins that I have witnessed in a very long time.  The starting QB John Beck was sacked 9 times on Sunday (the most sacks of  a Redskins Quarterback in 33 years).  It was Coach Mike Shanahan’s first time in his career that his team wasn’t able to score a single point…which tells you the depth of woes that this team is currently experiencing.  So after the Redskins game there was a buzz in the local bars and on social networks about the game…and who do you ask is starting such chatter?  The fans of the 2nd worst team in the division – the Dallas Cowboys.  These fans actually had the audacity to begin mocking and making fun of the Washington Redskins team and fans about their 23-0 loss to the Bills and how that will never happen to them.  How we all should stay tuned to watch a “REAL TEAM” play when the Cowboys face the Philadelphia Eagles.  Oh, and no way will they ever get behind a team by that much in the final of a game.  And for what it was worth they didn’t get behind a team that much at the end of a game, they did it in a half.  24-0  in the first half.  You guys are really delusional.  Experts say that the definition of insanity is repeating the exact same behavior and expecting a different results…and that’s what Dallas fans are…”INSANE”!  And to make my point even more clearer these “people” had the nerve to still ridicule the Redskins Fans that they actually scored and didn’t get shut out..even though they actually lost by more points than Washington…INSANE…I know…but it explains who they are.  The Washington and Dallas fans are family somewhere, I’m sure of it.  Because you have to have similar DNA to have the same thoughts that you guys share!!  So the next time you guys are at a bar or on a social network or at a game and you see each other you should really treat it as a FAMILY REUNION…Because you are more the same than you are different!!!!!!

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Friday’s Forum: Facebook Relationship Status?

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Dear toughtalker,
 
My husband has not acknowledged our marriage on facebook.  This makes me think he’s using it to meet or attract women.  When I ask him about it, he says that if he says he’s married, it makes him more appealing to women so he doesn’t want to open that door.  But he’s cheated before so I feel like this could just be another avenue for him to be able to cheat.  I don’t know if this excuse makes sense and I don’t want to ask friends because all of my friends/family hate him because of what he’s done before.  I don’t want to fly off the handle if there is some validity to this, but I don’t want to be a fool either.  And if I catch him cheating…I’m leaving!!!  But I don’t want to get stuck constantly checking and following after him either.  But is this facebook thing an obvious sign?
 
Frustrated

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Dear Frustrated,

I’m so happy and honored that you chose toughtalkdc to share your thoughts and we will do our best to give you another angle to view your dilemma.  I really don’t think that him acknowledging you on facebook is that big of a deal.  I actually have many friends that are on social networking sites that don’t label there relationship statuses, and have wonderful marriages.  So I don’t think that is too much of a issue, but the excuse that he gave you was a bit far fetched.  No man is going to use him getting attention from women as a excuse to not list you on their facebook.  People are messy and the more they see that you are happy, the more they want to see you unhappy.  And you know how the saying goes, “misery loves company”…and over the years I have come to the conclusion that statement is so so true!  But your husband should be able to fight off any unwanted advances, especially after the ordeal you guys have gone through in the past with his infidelity.  My question to you is after that incident, did you forgive him?  I’m asking that because if you really and truly did, then you have to trust in him and not continue to re-live the situation over and over again.  I’m not saying turn a blind eye to his behavior because no one deserves to be treated that way, but if you did forgive him then do just that, forgive him and try to move past it.  I have another suggestion for you: leave your family out of your personal relationships!!!  Involving family and friends will only make it more difficult for everyone involved.  You have forgiven your mate and now there is a uncomfortable feeling when the parties are mixed.  This is something that you have to deal with and you will have to hear opinions from both parties.  I’m sure it’s difficult to continue to justify your decisions, but you have no one to blame but yourself.  That is the situation you created.  In the future you should keep your personal relationships to yourself so you won’t have to juggle and go back and forth.  I’m going to leave you with this…facebook is just a social networking site that should not have any significant bearing on your relationship and if that’s your only gripe then I say let that one go and move on.  But if there’s more (and only you would know that), then my advice to you is open your eyes…deep down you know if this is a Facebook issue or something much deeper.  So you have to ask yourself do I really want the truth?  Because once you reveal it you have to accept it!!!  Have a wonderful weekend!!

Thoughts on Thursdays: Porn?

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Why is porn still considered taboo?  There are many of you that won’t even admit to some of your best friends that you even watch porn, let alone enjoy it.  My question to you is…WHY?  The adult film industry is a billion dollar business that produces hundreds, if not thousands, of films yearly in accordance with the rules of supply and demand so…if there wasn’t a demand, there wouldn’t be someone there to supply it.  That means that there is a market for such material and there is someone that is consuming it.  So why is it still labeled as “wrong”?  Why is such shame attached to it?  Why don’t we apply those same feelings to things that are actually bad for your body, such as alcohol.  You will go and meet a friend at a bar and stumble out and get behind the wheel of a car.  In doing so, putting  not only yourself, but other innocent lives at risk, without shame.  But let those same friends come and visit your home and there is an adult dvd case lying…you would discard that case…FAST!  Why?  Is it better to be drunk than to be an adult that watches movies that are made for adults?  I’m just saying…whatever you decide to do with your life and whatever you want to enjoy…then do just that ENJOY!!  JUST MY THOUGHTS PEOPLE!!!

What Were You Thinking: Terrell Owens

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Terrell Owens held a televised workout at a High School in Southern California on Tuesday and my only question for him is……..WHAT WERE YOU THINKING??  Mr. Owens, who is just 6 months removed from undergoing surgery to repair a torn left ACL,  invited NFL Representatives from all 32 teams to this event to gage his recovery…and no one from any team showed up.  Not a scout, not an assistant to the scout, not an intern, not the assistant to the traveling secretary, not a towel boy…NO ONE.  So my question to you Mr. Owens is: Whats Next??  How can you generate any interest from any team to possibly give you a workout to determine if you could be of any assistance to their team?  This is what you can do: STOP with all the Media Circus Crap!!  This is the reason why you’re in the predicament that you’re in now.  You want the world to be about T.O…but its not.  You’re not paying attention, and the world has passed you by without you even having a clue!  You’re a former Pro Bowl Receiver whose stats over his career should land him in the Hall of Fame amongst some of the greatest players to ever play this position.  But that’s not what’s muttered when your name is brought up.  Your accomplishments are the last thing that are mentioned.  Its all of the other things that come up.  Those self-inflicted PR moves that someone (who should have been fired a long time ago) advised you to make.  You have been so busy creating the “T.O. BRAND” that you forgot how you arrived here in the first place…being on a FOOTBALL TEAM.  And that’s what you’re lacking now, and without that, the “Brand” ceases to exist.  You have lost focus on what’s really important, the one thing that no matter what is going on in your life you could always turn too…that one thing that you have loved doing since you were 6 yrs old in the backyard…and that’s playing football.  Not the commercials, not the reality shows, not the guest appearances on sitcoms.  None of those things matter without football.  But if you don’t change your way of thinking and acting towards people you’re going to find yourself alone.  Just like you were on Tuesday at Calabasas High School.  Terrell Owens, get it together before its too late…..WHAT WERE YOU THINKING!!!!???

Tuesday’s Topic: “Keeping it Real” is for Liars!!!

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Good Morning Toughtalkers!  I’m here to discuss a statement that I believe has been overused and I don’t really understand the origin of the phrase….KEEP IT REAL.  Now this statement can be overheard in many different walks of life, from the playgrounds of the inner city to your local college campus…from your local barbershops/beauty salons to Madison Avenue.  This phrase is now used in commercials, movies, etc.  Even Dave Chappelle had a segment in his critically acclaimed Comedy Central show based around this statement!  And after all of that, I still have a hard time trying to understand the meaning.  I know its self explanatory, “keep it real” or “keep it 100”, but to me that’s implying that in some type of way, either you or I are a liar!!  If you have to tell me to keep it real with you, that means I have been lying to you and now you want me to be honest.  How many liars are you people encountering on a daily basis that you have to preface your conversation with “keep it real”?  Or are you the person that normally lies and everyone knows this…so by beginning your sentence with those 3 words, it gives you validity to your conversation?  You might as well say “I always lie to you, but this time I’m telling you the truth!!”  If you have to state “I’m keeping it real” to your family and friends then you may need to start keeping it real with yourself….You Liars!

It’s Monday: Colts Massacre!

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The Indianapolis Colts, you have to be kidding me!  62-7……ARE YOU SERIOUS??  The Colts were dismantled in front of a Nationally Televised audience last night on NBC’s Sunday Night Football’s “game of the week”.  The perpetrator of such a crime were the New Orleans Saints, who are a very good team with an excellent Quarterback in Drew Brees.  But they aren’t THAT good!  I don’t think any team in the modern era of the NFL is that good!!  The Colts seemed so over matched last night, it was like The Saints were playing against a Junior Varsity Division 3 football team.  Colts, this was an embarrassment not only to yourselves, but to the fans of the league…and I will go as far as saying it was a embarrassment to the league itself!  I know the Colts have lost there All-World, First-Ballot, Hall Of Fame Quarterback in Peyton Manning to a neck injury, but that cant be an excuse to why you’re this bad. There was another Hall of Fame Quarterback (Tom Brady) who was injured a few years ago and that team (New England Patriots) rallied around their new starter.  And even though that team didn’t make the playoffs that season, they played hard and I think they finished with a 10-6 record.  So Colts, you have started the season with a 0-7 start…have some pride about yourselves!  You guys are all professionals and should be ashamed to even pick up your paychecks this week!!!  You should donate them to that Division 3 Junior Varsity team that I mentioned earlier.  I believe they would have put up a better effort and showing than you did on Sunday night!!!!

Friday’s Forum: Men Watching Porn

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Dear Toughtalker,

My man likes to watch porn…OFTEN.  That’s okay with me (for the most part).  But, he watches girls that look nothing like me!  Is that cause for concern?  I mean, what does that say?  If I’m light and a little on the thick side, why is he watching skinny dark-skinned girls all the time?  Does that mean that’s what he’s really attracted to?  I don’t want to be insecure about this, but I am.  And I don’t want to ask him.
 
Anonymous
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Good Morning Anonymous,
So glad you felt comfortable enough to share your letter with toughtalkdc and our Friday’s Forum.  I truly believe that you’re putting entirely way too much thought into your man’s actions.  When men are watching porn it is strictly for fantasy purposes only.  He is watching for adult pleasure and stimulation, and you MUST be somewhere near him while he is watching because you know the type of women that are featured in the film!  So that means you and your man have a healthy adult relationship where he feels comfortable around you viewing such movies, unlike some relationships where you have to hide your movies, magazines , etc.  I think you’re stressing over something that’s really minor.  You stated what I think is the most important thing with first two words of your letter…MY MAN!!  He is YOUR man which means you and him met, there was an attraction there, and you became a couple.  Do you think if there wasn’t an attraction and you’re not his type, or if he preferred  someone or something different that it would have evolved into a relationship?  You and your man courted, dated and became so fond of each other that you chose to enter into a relationship with one another.  Do you think all of this would have occurred if your weren’t his type or preference?  Please don’t allow something as trivial as what type of lady he is viewing on a film bring any fabricated turmoil into your relationship!  I think you’re putting way too much thought into his actions.  He is just watching an adult movie.  Men really don’t put that much thought and preparation into who they’re watching on a porn dvd, its the act, not the actresses that they’re interested in.  And even if that is his fantasy and he likes to view different kinds of women (shape, color) than how you look, how does that take away from who he has chosen to be in a relationship with?  That fantasy is just that, fantasy…you’re his reality.  So I say the next time he is viewing one of these films, pull up a seat next to him!  While he is watching the film, begin to rub on him and enjoy him, and I PROMISE you the response that you will receive will erase all doubts and answer any of the questions that you have been wondering about!  His actions will show you who and what he prefers…The Reality!!  Have A Wonderful Weekend.

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